My friend, @micahdances, wrote a beautiful post on Facebook about being a true romantic.
Micah’s a 22 year old young man who is, indeed, a true romantic. In his writing, he shares a story about his encounter with Nicholas Sparks and what he learned from the prolific author of some of the most memorable love stories of this century. In fact, it was this man who wrote The Notebook – probably my favorite movie of all time – a movie I watched with my now twelve year old son recently (and blogged about here) to give my son a glimpse of what true love can look like over the span of a lifetime.
Micah’s encounter with Nicholas Sparks, in Micah’s words:
What stuck with Micah sticks with me: “To really make a woman happy, give of yourself, and create an atmosphere where she wants to give back to you.”
Nicholas Sparks captured more than the essence of romance – he identified the key to happy relationships of every kind. To make people happy, we must focus not on what we want from them, but on giving, and giving with the focus of creating an atmosphere in which they want to give back. This concept is far reaching. Having recently jumped into what feels like a social media movement, I’ve been absorbing material from people like Mitch Joel, Chris Brogan, Julien Smith, Erik Qualman and Tamar Weinberg. I’ve observed a common thread between the words Nicholas Sparks shared with Micah and the message being spread through social media conferences, books, blogs and tweets. What Sparks conceptualizes for romantic relationships is the very foundation of all successful relationships, including successful business practices: successful marketing, successful customer service, successful sales, successful employment relationships, successful client relationships and so much more. It’s at the heart of long-term, sustainable, mutually-satisfying relationships – both personal and professional, intimate or commercial.
Give of yourself and you will create an atmosphere in which others want to give back. It’s not quid pro quo. It’s the atmosphere of giving – an environment in which reciprocation is a natural outflow. The wisdom is universal – applicable to the love of your life or the heart of your business. .
